Yes I should stop doing that. I ought to stop doing that but I just can't. Sometimes you feel so awful that the only thing you could do is to blame yourself. Honestly speaking I do not like that feeling at all. I could forgive and forget what people did wrong to me in the past. But not myself.
Yes I am good in hiding my feelings. For one moment I wanted to breakdown and cry my heart out but I hid my feelings so well that nobody would know. I am getting better in doing that. I know it is useless to cry but sometimes you feel so helpless that the only way out is to cry.
I tried to do everything I could but they seemed to be useless. I look so calm and optimistic on the outside, but deep within me, I am scolding myself for being so careless and mindless.
I am so mad at myself.
I made this for someone else. It seems so easy
to love someone else than yourself.
It is just so ironic that I could say I love someone else when in reality I could not even love myself enough to forgive myself. And yes I feel like crying again.
Smile. Love. Persevere.
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